Some days you just want to fly, fly away...
Lou Reed!!!
I'm not saying that I live on the Dirty Boulevard by any means, but I can understand the desire to get away. Not a vacation, but a whole departure from all that is the same old thing and comfortable and familiar. Fly fly away from the world I know and do something completely different.
There are times that I wonder if there is something missing in my heart that might be somewhere else. Its a search for completion that drives me to keep going, keep striving, keep looking for different things and different experiences. Striving for that one illusive something that is just over the horizon, and just out of reach.
Not sure if I'll ever find it, or if this stupid insatiable aspect of my soul will ever be sated or if it will kill me... either that or the grammar police will get me with that last run-on sentence.
Like many other artists, I often find myself in these kinds of situations. The search for that illusive spark or passion. The one that will finally satisfy that itch that makes me so uncomfortable in my own skin. Maybe if I find it, I can start to like myself. Who knows?
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
To blog or not to blog...
That is the question, isn't it?
Lately it seems that there are more and more things to complain about and less and less things to celebrate. Could be the gloomy weather, and it could be just me. In either case, here's whats up with me:
Working as much and as hard as I can. There is always room for improvement, and being that business isn't as booming as we'd like, I'm not working as much as I'd want.
Health problems with family are always interesting. Dad is the most recent recipient of heart attacks in the family. A stent and a partial blockage later, he's back at home. Needless to say, he's not a fan of his new "heart friendly" diet. No more butter and whole milk... But he can still have garlic, which is good.
Wedding planning is going well, and we have a caterer now! Johnny Carinos is officially doing our catering as of today. I still have to put down a deposit and sign the paperwork, but it looks good. Simple fare for simple people. They were unable to provide a bartender, but I'm optimistic about finding a good one.
Dress construction plans are going well too. I'm going to the gym again, albeit not in any discernible pattern.
So, all things considered, its going pretty well. Now I just need to figure out some sort of routine that I can do around my flexible schedule and try and make some sense out of the chaos. Maybe the key is to keep breathing and just keep chipping away at the things that need to get done.
Slow and steady...
That, and to keep writing. I think that helps too.
Lately it seems that there are more and more things to complain about and less and less things to celebrate. Could be the gloomy weather, and it could be just me. In either case, here's whats up with me:
Working as much and as hard as I can. There is always room for improvement, and being that business isn't as booming as we'd like, I'm not working as much as I'd want.
Health problems with family are always interesting. Dad is the most recent recipient of heart attacks in the family. A stent and a partial blockage later, he's back at home. Needless to say, he's not a fan of his new "heart friendly" diet. No more butter and whole milk... But he can still have garlic, which is good.
Wedding planning is going well, and we have a caterer now! Johnny Carinos is officially doing our catering as of today. I still have to put down a deposit and sign the paperwork, but it looks good. Simple fare for simple people. They were unable to provide a bartender, but I'm optimistic about finding a good one.
Dress construction plans are going well too. I'm going to the gym again, albeit not in any discernible pattern.
So, all things considered, its going pretty well. Now I just need to figure out some sort of routine that I can do around my flexible schedule and try and make some sense out of the chaos. Maybe the key is to keep breathing and just keep chipping away at the things that need to get done.
Slow and steady...
That, and to keep writing. I think that helps too.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year internet!
Every year that goes by is bittersweet, to me at least. There are new faces coming into our lives, and beloved faces leaving them. To look back in regret is something that no one should do, unless you're on a killing spree, then yes... regret the killing part and go turn yourself in. Right now.
Most of us do not look back at the previous year and think "Damn, I really shouldn't have done that" or "Man, I know that was a dumb thing to try". Actually, most of the people I talk to around New years are saying: "This next year I'm going to..." Fill in the blank.
New Year's Resolutions!
They range from anything as trite (and redundant) as losing 5, 10, 50 lbs to endeavoring to buy a small island. But its a goal. A dream, if you will... and I won't begrudge anyone their dreams. I've had the weight loss one so many years in a row that I don't count it as a resolution anymore. I did make one, though.
Don't worry, its not "blog every day" cause we know thats not going to happen.
Actually, I'm going to finish one of my stories and try and get it published. Hell, in this age of digital publishing, I might just do that part myself.
Whether or not anything gets done is not really the relevant part of the resolution. Its more that things are being done in the spirit of self-improvement. Its sort of like what my brother, Thomas always used to say when I was a kid "Shoot for the stars, and even if you never quite make it that far, you'll still be further than if you had never tried at all."
I like that.
Every year that goes by is bittersweet, to me at least. There are new faces coming into our lives, and beloved faces leaving them. To look back in regret is something that no one should do, unless you're on a killing spree, then yes... regret the killing part and go turn yourself in. Right now.
Most of us do not look back at the previous year and think "Damn, I really shouldn't have done that" or "Man, I know that was a dumb thing to try". Actually, most of the people I talk to around New years are saying: "This next year I'm going to..." Fill in the blank.
New Year's Resolutions!
They range from anything as trite (and redundant) as losing 5, 10, 50 lbs to endeavoring to buy a small island. But its a goal. A dream, if you will... and I won't begrudge anyone their dreams. I've had the weight loss one so many years in a row that I don't count it as a resolution anymore. I did make one, though.
Don't worry, its not "blog every day" cause we know thats not going to happen.
Actually, I'm going to finish one of my stories and try and get it published. Hell, in this age of digital publishing, I might just do that part myself.
Whether or not anything gets done is not really the relevant part of the resolution. Its more that things are being done in the spirit of self-improvement. Its sort of like what my brother, Thomas always used to say when I was a kid "Shoot for the stars, and even if you never quite make it that far, you'll still be further than if you had never tried at all."
I like that.
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